varumaiyin niram sivapu

the colour of poverty is red .i thought it had something to do with karl or such shit

.or maybe blood .but its not .now i know what that red is .tomato .tomato juice to be precise.

so last week i had gupchup .big news right .except that i had for 10rs .daily .and thats all .nothing else .cook off for a week. daily evening gupchup. no money. and in extreme desperation i had raw tomato juice . its nice actually .so no solid food at all. except sunday where i busted my months balance in dominos. and i dont have a single paise for the rest of the month. now what makes this worse is my routine.its like see champions league match.that ends at 3.30 in the night. 4 before i sleep.mosquitoes means no sleep.6.30 shiva wakes me up and gym.get back by 8.30. infact after a months i had a bath this morning.its usually done in the evening after football.anyways somehow get to college.come back.fm,blog and all.then football.then normally bath.then ghupchup.more football on tv.hit the sack.i am famished.never my body has felt so weak.infact one night i just boiled cauliflowers and had them.such is my state .penniless.

you see in school me had enough money .sis gave me almost 100 a day. dad would give 200 r 300 a week. for a school going fellow who ate in joy,kapi kadai mcrenet and likes,this was enough. morever sathyam tickets cost 70 or 80. and the girl always had money. it was good then .but me always felt guilty .knowing how parents and all grew up. in cranky places with so many kids and hardly any special care .so when i was coming off for college i told my appa i wont need more than 2k per month. mad me. infact stupid. but i got typhoid when i came here. so end of first year my expenses were at 40k. ultra guilty. so from second year till now i never gone over board. of course extra money for trips and all. but i have learnt to live with this.

i like it this way. but downside-i cant hang out with chennai friends who were damn close. those poeple eat out all the time in good places,movies and all. all have loads of money. but me dint.and i cringed when someone else sponsored. end point? i hardly hang out with them now. sad.but what can i do. in that way i like my raipur gang. most of them with similar spending powers.

and these last three months have been bad. before i had those trips to nagpur for entrances .then mumbai trip where i blew a few k..and then in one day of madness i spent 10k from my credit card. fucked. and i told my dad he could cut 500 from the rest months money. he hasnt. my expenses out of hand. rajim trip ate up a bit. and i booked a few rajdhani tickets for amma .ate about a grand there. ah yes corruption.dad dint mind.

usually if i ask for 200 they put 500 .whenever i ask they will put money. but this pint sized human has everest sized ego.even with my appa.since second year i have resisted and never asked for extra.we have gone a few days with only ghupchup.when the world seemed cruel.i would somehow pick up change here and there and use that five to get cadbury. cant resist that.even that i havent had this week .fuck. i dont know where i get so much ego. like i was stranded in mumbai. no tickets.had to get back home. filthy rich uncle gets me an air ticket.me said no,told him i got train ticket .and i dint get one. so i ended up going to chennai from mumbai in general. 32 hours. i wonder what will happen when i start earning? will i get intolerably arrogant? like my cousins who i have come to hate.coz of whom i started hating it..

but i look forward to the earning part.money of my own.most of friends will study ,so i can spend as much as them. and its my money. and i can fill in my education loan which thankfully isnt much .i know appa will say no but i want to fill it myself .and i look forward to getting back to chennai. where my heart rests. where my body wants to rest .i want a life within means. bare minimum. and i have a job that lets me do that. in future too i have set a salaray cap for myself .never go above that.and dont buy stuff on loan .save and get. and never go out of india. for money.

infact never go outside chennai. one of my frniend in iitm,rejected relience(good money) coz it was not in chennai. he says he is prepared to go till koyembedu.(not even outskirts.its like inside).lol .such creatures we are. in love with city. just give me my idly and cd. and man put saatnee..

free

ps-if any bastard shows the devils horn during the bsb shit during cock in india i swear on parmar i will kill and castrate them.fuck you dna