cheena komi chan komi cha cha komi chan

its been long since i went a on a long train journey. 28 hours to delhi. i felt like an ant stuck inside a vibrator dildo. every time i did manage to sleep off a guy will wake me up with a cup of butter and soup stick. every fucking time. it was an automated system response. after one such futile attempt i climbed down from my upper berth. i expected to meet sudarar or vichadarar. but a shapeless lump with a shapeless beard sat there. lets call this entity shankar mahadevan. so i asked him all the questions any eager fan would shoot. sar why do you use a lot of words like kudi soniye and all in your song?...he smiled. sly... let me tell you one thing yaar.. life is about two things.. kudi and kadi.. kudi mane the girl.. kadi mane the food... i had to interrupt him here..sar in chennai also its kudi and kadi.. he blinked.. so i let him continue..he spoke about singing and all.. modulation- he tells me is the most important thing in singing.. you need to get into the feel of the song yaar..( he is correct. see 1.27-1.32 and 2.48-3 in this video)

its my fifth day here in ncr. and i have come to realize loads of things. to start with there are more punjabis in dilli than dilli people. you can obviously tell the male punjabi guys apart from the dilli guys. to start with there are no dilli guys. so that solves the problem. the ladies side aint that complicated. the punjabi girls are easy to spot. they are "well built" or "big bones" as the case be. they are taller than me. now thats pretty easy given am short but still if someone is shorter than me then they are not a punjabi kudi. and then they have moustache. and girdha (dont know englees for that).. and a bit of beard. you see the facial hair is not easy to spot. they shave it off. and they are pretty fair and they dont have black hair. its when the sun shines on her you see the golden coloured hair. some people think that punjabi girls are the dilli guys. please note that it is not. as i have already stated the latter entry donest exist. its extinct. a myth. and the punjabi girls are scary. like really scary. they are violent people. really violent. i mean just see the army. all the singh people are there. the rest of us indians are very peaceful. these punjabis want to fight all the time. we should send them all to pakistan. but really punjabi girls are the most boisterous of the lot. also i find their sense of humour to be of poor quality. no puns. and what was their state called?

now dont mistake me for a prejudiced fellow or worse rasict. am neither. i mean i just dont blindly call all chinkys as chinkys. i also call them nepalinikki. or korea. the point is am neither prejudiced or rasict. . only those humans whose face resembles a damaged kinetic honda engine which has met with an accident  (or resembles the crushed vadai in the vada poche vadivel scene), only those people who have small eyes that they try to make all the devices to their eye sight scale (and the world thinks they are genius and  hail them. smaller the device the costlier it is) , they have voldermot slits for nose and stand at about 73.6 cms from the ground. these people are chinkys. other chinkys are not chinkys. they are humans. they need to be respected. this of course means chinkys are not humans. they are just not our size. in all departments. most of the viagra ads are in chinese. people say there are so many chinese in the world. but if you consider the total volume , like in metre cube, i think all races equate pretty much the same.[ i hope you have listened to that excellent song by bruno on world peace and koreans]. so now that i have clarified let me type on.

the work. ah yes. you know something is fundamentally fucked up with the company when the firsr hr girl who addresses the new comers first is a white girlish version of sendhil. impress us guys. alteast show us some hope on the first day. later you can kill us. send some good chicks atleast for the formal hello welcome to shit intro. so only six of us. i like this. not part of a big herd. company has 300 employees. 3 offices in gurgaon. from friday new office. training for two weeks. people are pretty lax here. or so it appears. they walk in t-shirts and jeans. no dress code. but they are bloody efficient. pharma based company. these people basically tell the pharma companies how to cheat you. so pretty much in the class of doctors and lawyers. they explained to us how the industry works. the pharma side and what we are to do. its pretty evil work. am i evil? yes i am. so from monday i start two week training in a nice place. loads of eat outs. and smoking chicks. i hope i get a kudikum kudi.

also unexpected stuff and people overwhelm you. thank you two random people and two more random facebook frands..and when someone whom you respect a lot tells you nice things..it does feel good..  of course all these five people above are saying is fuck you bastard. go kill your life.  i know am blowing my own nadhaswaram here.. but this is the only mushy pheelings outlet la..feels nice to type out.

that would be it



Shalini said...

its not "golden hair"...they get it bleached.

Tangled up in blue... said...

I so get this whole post! LOL! This is stuff I thought when I first went to Delhi man! And yup, it is bleached hair, most definitely! :D

And trust me, the Punju sense of humour is so, umm, "boisterous" that they dont really need puns ;)

soin said...

@shalini.. i prefer golden..

@tuib.. wait wait i will write one such template for mumbai girls too.free

Naarya said...

Crushed vada in vada poche scene.... LOL!

Destination Infinity said...

Too good... The white sendhil part was the best!!

Destination Infinity